terrible twos, take two

Ben has several meltdowns each day. He goes from sweetness to tantrum in 0 seconds. Usually, it is so hilarious that we are stifling laughter. It goes something like this:

I tell Ben it's time to go pee. Sometimes he remembers to go on his own, but if he waits more than an hour, he tends to have accidents, so I remind him. He hates it and starts crying and yelling. I bring him to the hall bathroom. It's not that he doesn't want to pee or that he doesn't need to or doesn't like it. He just doesn't like that I have told him he needs to.

He yells, "NOOOO!!! I wanna go pee there!" pointing down the hall to the master bathroom, as if he's mad that I took him to the wrong bathroom.
I say, "Ok, let's go pee in Mama's bathroom."
"NOOOO!!! I wanna go pee there!" pointing to the hall bathroom.
"Ok, let's go pee in the hall bathroom."
"NOOOO!!! I wanna go pee there!"
"Ok..."
"NOOOO!!! I wanna go pee there!
"NOOOO!!! I wanna go pee there!
"NOOOO!!! I wanna go pee there!
"NOOOO!!! I wanna go pee there!
"NOOOO!!! I wanna go pee there!
"NOOOO!!! I wanna go pee there!"

Back and forth. Now he's just arguing with himself. Finally he runs into the master bathroom. We have both a sitting toilet and a squatting one in there, thus the back and forth – "NOOOO!!! I wanna go pee there! NOOOO!!! I wanna go pee there!" – resumes, at full volume. He settles on the sitting toilet. However, now he has to decide, arguing with no one but himself and still crying and yelling, whether he will stand on the stool to pee or sit on the seat. When he's worn himself out, he pees, brings his pants to me to help him get dressed again, and walks away like nothing ever happened.

Sometimes I decide for him which bathroom and toilet he should use, but the tantrum still lasts the same amount of time. Last night, he didn't want to say his prayer until he'd said his Bible verse, but he didn't want to say his verse because he wanted to go to bed, but he didn't want to go to bed until he said his prayer... It's like he just needs to get it out of his system because I had the nerve to tell him to do something. It's hard not to laugh at him and say, "Ben, you are so two."